People hook up all the time, everywhere. It happens every minute in every country. Maybe, down the street from where you live, a guy is on the phone with his soon-to-be woman. But, as it is well put in The Matrix: Revolutions, "Everything that has a beginning, has an end."

As often as people start relationships, they are broken. Cheating, lying, selfishness, or not being compatible, these are all factors of a break-up. It seems very natural though, just as natural as death. Not everyone can stay together forever with their first love. You must go out into the world and you must evaluate all options available. Staying with one person for a long time can be wasteful if you haven't found your best option.

So yea, what about after a break-up? Can they still occupy the same room and not have a grudge? Can they talk like old friends as if nothing ever went wrong? Will they kill each other with spoons?

It seems as though the most logical thing to do, in my opinion, is to ignore the other half of the failed relationship. Pain has been inflicted, and everyone would rather ignore pain than address it. If you ignore something long enough, it goes away, right?

But, how can you ignore someone you have grown close to? I mean, two people make a commitment to be there for each other, and all of the sudden they can deny that the other exists?

Only, they tell themselves that the other doesn't exist. They can't truly believe it. Certain smells, visions, and feelings can make someone remember what happened. Walking down the street and seeing someone with a similar appearance is all it takes to bring back memories of joy, and sadness. And then it starts...

You want to call the other person, just to hear their voice. You want to know how they are doing, and what they are doing. You want to know the most important thing. Are they thinking of you?

People split into two different types at this moment. They either a) pick up the phone, make the call, ask the questions or b) they tell themselves again that the other does not exist. Both require will power, and both are just as difficult. The difference is found in the thought process of the person with questions. People either let their feelings make the decision, or they analyze each move and probable outcomes much like a game of chess.

This is what enters the mind of a person (in this case, I'll use the ex-boyfriend POV) who uses...

Feelings

"If I call, will she talk to me? Will she tell me that she still has feelings for me, or will she yell out words of hatred? What if I don't call? Will I ever talk to her again? Wait, do I really want to talk to her again? She did do 'this and that.' Do I still have feelings for her?" Now this person balances the scales, and he sees the pros to outweigh the cons. The feeling of love is greater than any amount of physical or emotional pain.

Insight

"Let's say I call, she could ignore everything I say. She could also hang up on me. What's the point of calling? She may have feelings for me, but wouldn't she call me then? What if she's thinking the same exact thing I am? If I call her first, does that make me the bigger person? What if I don't call? No harm if nothing is said. Shouldn't I just keep my words to myself?" And then the person weighs the pros and cons. The pain that the cons represent will eventually outweigh the pros, because now there is doubt in the mind about whether they are a good couple or not, seeing as how they broke-up. Doubt is quite a thing.

The length of time that the couple ignore each other all depends on how long they stick to the same thought process. After long enough, the thinking stops. The smaller feelings are fade, and memories are forgotten. Day by day, the pain dies away, until one morning, you don't feel anything. It takes weeks, months, or even years for some. Time heals all wounds.

Is it better to ignore someone after a break-up, even if it means for the rest of your life?

I don't know. I've seen cases where exes are friends and get along. I've seen cases where exes being in the same room almost always means a fight. I have not experienced both sides for myself either. But then again, it is easy for me to form a grudge against you, and it is easy for it to disappear. I remember every action, and I can forgive very easily.

If someone who has had a break-up at least once talks about their current emotions to a member of the opposite sex, it suggests that the feelings for the ex still remain. Yet, the person spilling their guts could do it as a sign of openness, and as a signal of interest. Boy, does that lead to an awkward moment...ha!

I'm going to sleep.

"Sleep! Yea! That's where I'm a viking!" - Ralph Wiggum